I Misunderestimated W.

Today, as I was driving to work, I received a call from my sister. She told me to turn the radio to NPR, where the Interim Prime Minister of Iraq was addressing Congress. My sister, a Kerry supporter, feels that the speech may be the nail in Kerry's coffin. As I thought about that comment throughout the day, I tend to agree with her assessment.

Although I believe that the Prime Minister was painting an overly-rosey portrait on the situation oversees, I am beginning to feel that no matter how horribly I believe the war is going, there are enough "status quo" people out there to keep Georgie in office. I see and hear people everywhere who refuse to actually look at what's going on (both internationally and domestically) and profess their undying allegiance to their King. That just astonishes me! What makes people like this guy so much? Is it the fact that:

• ...he is the last president since Hoover to have a net loss in jobs?
• ...he hoodwinked the American people to buy into his agenda of invading Iraq?
• ...he squandered an inherited budget surplus by "generously" giving people tax refunds, only to drive the deficit into astronomical heights, instead of investing it or allocating those funds to other needs?
• ...he entered Iraq without a real strategic plan?
• ...the country hasn't been this divided since the 60s?
• ...he belittles his middle class supporters by speaking in in a more "folksy" tone by speaking in colloquialisms?

I'm seriously beginning to think that he has some superpower that hypnotises people when they make eye contact with him or that people become brainwashed when he presses a button on his watch (Similar to the movie Naked Gun, where Reggie Jackson was programmed to assassinate the Queen. "I must kill the queen").

Anyways, I am just waiting patiently until the debates. I believe that is the only way Bush loses in November. HE MUST STUMBLE. A tie is not good enough. He must lose decisively for Kerry to have a chance. I hate to admit that, but I'm afraid it may be true.

So, in true juvenile fashion, copied below is a poem that appeared in the Washington Post, which was written by a satirist. However, it's a poem that is entirely made up of Georgie's quotes.

If you can't beat them, just ridicule them...

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MAKE THE PIE HIGHER by George W. Bush

I think we all agree, the past is over. This is still a dangerous world. It's a world of madmen and uncertainty and potential mental losses. Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning? Will the highways of the Internet become more few? How many hands have I shaked?

They misunderestimate me. I am a pitbull on the pantleg of opportunity. I know that the human being and the fish can coexist. Families is where our nation finds hope, where our wings take dream. Put food on your family! Knock down the tollbooth! Vulcanize Society! Make the pie higher! Make the pie higher!